(no subject)

yay i have a date with joe on friday afternoon im actuacly very excited. this could be fun!! he wont tell me where we are going or what we are doing though he deffently has my curiosity peaked!

(no subject)

nothin like moving...
driving down 70 with a matteress on top of dennis van
being atacked by the "slip n slide"
eating some delicious lagerheads
feeding the ducks some garlic bread...
and finishing it off by jumpin in the mon with all your clothes on minus a bra....
getting fun of by dennis, rj, and baeckel for the lack of bra...
and then... climbing through a window in order to let baeckel in to his apartment....
fun stuff

week of fun

so on thursday was dennis' 26th birthday and wed night we all went up to jozart i made him birthday punch which he seemed to enjoy then we all went out to jcoles to comense celebrating his birthday. then thursday we went out again to lagerheads this time. me holly and his sis were just sitting around the table and all of a sudden out of know where his sis turns to me and is like "you like dirt dont you" and so i said no......... she could oviously tell i was lying and proceeded to ask me the same question over and over again till i finally said yes and told the truth and she was like good im hooking the two of you up! dennis needs a nice girl and your a nice girl. i like you and dirt does what i say so im gonna hook you two up!

i guess thats a good sign his sis wants to see us together... haha oh well i just wish he wanted to see us together. i really care for him alot. too much probably.

i dont know what it is with him i just feel so comfortable around him and i just dont want to leave his embrace. theres something about him that i just cant get enough of. i just hope he feels some what the same about me. i wish i knew how he really felt. when we do talk about us he always does it so eloquently but almost in like a code afraid to say whatever it is hes feeling in plain english. maybe then it becomes to real. i wish i could physically tell him how i feel about him but im too scared. i can only do it through written words. sometimes it seems like he really cares about me and then other times its like im nothing to him. just another person. i wish i knew what i was to him. and i wish he knew what i was to him to i think thats part of the problem he doesnt know what we are either. this maybe the most complicated relationship i have ever had but at the same time its the best and the simplist as well its a paradox. theres so much passion and romance yet i think we are both terrified of getting hurt that we have trouble taking the leap. i think everyone in there life has one great love wether they end up with that person or not. and i dont know i think dennis might be it for me. theres some connection there that ive never felt before and quite honestly i dont want to feel it with anyone else. because its special with him and wether we end up together eventually or not i know we had our moments. there are so many powerful passionate moments that we have shared together so many embraces so many small kisses so many big ones. so many laughs and smiles and all the butterflys and all of the shyness nothing can compare.

anyway enough about that. tonight was fun me holly aly and marissa all hung out and ate pizza and talked for 6 hours or so it was a good time the 4 of us might be going to pittsburgh later on this afternoon *since it is almost 4am...* to goto a bunch of diff. musseums and that kind of thing.


i wish i knew how this will all work out in the future but for now i want to enjoy the now! and live it up and savor what i have at my finger tips. he might be holding me at arms length and pulling me and out at his convience but at least hes holding me at all!

(no subject)

wow...
in a month and 2 days my best friend will be married.. wow..
and a month and 9 days colleen will be married too...
3 of us down 5 to go...
when did we grow up?

(no subject)

this past weekend was great! im glad to have my friend back i missed him missed talking to him missed laying in his arms im glad that things are good and i got to spend the weekend the way i did! it was deff. a fun filled packed weekend fri was dennis' show at lagerheads got to hang out there with holly and aly and alys friend jen and then holly aly dennis and i went to jcoles after that to hear classified then dennis and i went to his friend mark's house then back to my place ended up going to sleep around 7am then got up and went to hollys moms boy friend's house for her brothers graduation party hung out there with hol and a baeckel then backel dennis and i watched movies at baeckles and then dennis and i came back to my place at 6am. now im relaxing with some law and order csi and house. i love weekends like this. i love that i got to talk to dennis i missed our long talks. i love sleeping in his arms even if he gets grumpy when i try to wake him up because he has to goto work.. i dono it just feels right laying next to him with his arms around me. more right then anything else ive ever known.
  • Current Mood
    mellow mellow

curse broken

i just realized i broke the curse... hopefully..
its been a year and 16 days since my last accident...last year it was a year and 11 days later i was in another accident and im 5 days past the 11 day mark.. so hopefully nothing happens again!